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Sexual Abstinence

Sexual Abstinence
Sexual Abstinence

What is the sexual abstinence or “not right now” method

Sexual Abstinence, also known as the “not right now” method, is the delaying or avoidance of all or some sexual activities. If you do not have vaginal sex, you will not get pregnant. In a broader sense, the word abstinence may mean different things to different individuals.

If you are looking at abstinence from a contraception basis, it is defined as the avoidance of sexual behaviors that introduce semen into a vagina. This definition does, however, recognize that some sexually transmitted diseases (STIs) can be transmitted through skin-to-skin contact.

Primary abstinence is practiced when someone who has never been sexually active delays some or all sexual behaviors.

Secondary abstinence is practiced when someone who has previously been sexually active intentionally decides to delay or avoid all or some sexual behaviors.

Periodic abstinence is defined as a sexually active person abstaining from vaginal-penile sex during the fertile days of a menstrual cycle (1).

A person can choose to abstain from vaginal sex only but still have other forms of sex. Practicing these other forms of sexual activity is defined by Planned Parenthood as outercourse.

How does abstinence work?

If you do not have vaginal sex, you will not get pregnant. This method is a conscious, deliberate decision to not have vaginal sex. It is a decision you will need to remember every day.

To stick with this method, you must keep reminding yourself why you chose to not have vaginal sex. It also helps to think about the potential consequences of changing your mind. If you decide to have sex, make sure you are protected with another effective contraceptive method.

How is abstinence practiced?

While there is no single way of practicing abstinence, here are some useful tips that will help you practice abstinence more effectively:

– Avoid putting yourself in situations where it will be hard to stick to your decision.
– Whenever possible, consider avoiding alcohol and drugs as they can mess with your judgment.
– Find people you can talk to about your decision and lean on them for support.
– Talk about your decision with your partner well before you are in the heat of the moment.
– Be straightforward and clear with your partner about your limits.
– Explore other intimacy options that you might enjoy just as much.
– Remember to protect yourself from STIs that do not require vaginal sex to be transmitted.

How effective is Sexual Abstinence?

When vaginal sex is avoided, abstinence can be 100% effective at preventing pregnancy. If you use it all the time, you are guaranteed to not get pregnant. However, it requires self-control and, therefore, some people may find it extremely difficult to use. If you are using this method and engaging in other sexual activities, abstinence may not prevent some STIs (2).

While abstinence is theoretically very effective at preventing pregnancy, most people are not able to practice it correctly. Notably, there is no evidence to show that abstinence education programs among young people reduce the risk of unplanned pregnancies and STIs. Abstinence is known to be more effective when practiced by older, mature couples and to be less effective when drug and alcohol usage is involved and when there are strong sexual feelings between a couple (3).

When should you consider the sexual abstinence method?

– If your religion is against any other method of contraception.
– If you have agreed with your partner to abstain for moral, religious, or cultural reasons.
– If you have no access to another method of contraceptive.

Contraception Quiz

Need more help choosing your ideal method? Take our contraceptive quiz.

Answer a few simple questions, and based on the responses, we will recommend contraceptive options that could work for you.

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External Condom

Compare with similar Contraceptive Methods

Are you wondering if condoms are better than daily pills? Or if you should opt for a birth control implant? We're here to assist you in making this decision. You can select up to 5 contraceptive methods and compare them side by side to weigh the pros and cons of each.

Give a try to our Contraceptive Tool

In the example below, you'll find similar methods to the one you're currently reading about. Feel free to click on any that catch your interest or revisit our Contraceptive Methods page

Lactational amenorrhea method (LAM)

Natural

What is it?
The Lactational amenorrhea method(LAM) is a short-term, natural contraceptive centered around exclusive or almost exclusive breastfeeding within 6 months after giving birth, so long as your menstrual bleeding has not returned.
Effectiveness
  • It is 98-99% effective
  • Pros
    • Highly effective for those who meet the criteria.
    • Eliminates the need for supplementary nutrition for the breastfeeding baby.
    • It’s a natural and non-hormonal method.
    • There are no side effects.
    Cons
    • Recommended for only 6 months after childbirth.
    • It’s dependent on a smooth lactation experience.
    • High failure rates when not practiced correctly.
    • It does not protect from STIs.
    Withdrawal method (pull-out method)

    Natural

    The withdrawal method involves pulling out in time to prevent sperm from entering the body.
  • It's 80% effective.
    • It’s easy to hide.
    • It’s cheap. You don’t need supplies or a clinic or pharmacy visit.
    • It’s non-hormonal and has no side effects.
    • It’s a high effort method. Its effectiveness relies on the male partner’s self-control.
    • It has a high rate of failure; it isn’t easy to perform perfectly every single time.
    • It does not protect from STIs.
    Sexual Abstinence

    Natural

    Sexual abstinence is delaying or avoiding all or some sexual activities.
  • It's 100% effective.
    • When fully complied with, it’s the most effective way of preventing pregnancy and STIs.
    • It’s easy to hide. No one will know.
    • There are no side effects.
    • It requires discipline and self-control.
    • It’s reliant on clear communication and cooperation from your partner.
    Fertility awareness methods

    Natural

    The fertility awareness methods involve pregnancy prevention by keeping track of your menstrual cycle to determine the days that you can get pregnant and avoiding sex on those days.
  • It's 76-88% effective.
    • It’s easy to hide as it doesn’t require supplies and a clinic or pharmacy visit.
    • It’s a natural and non-hormonal method.
    • There are no side effects.
    • It’s high effort and requires discipline, planning, and cooperation from your partner.
    • The calendar and standard days methods will only work if you have regular periods.
    • It doesn’t protect from STIs.

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