Consent: You dey understand am already
Everyday somebody go come talk about sexual consent, more people go dey talk sey them no dey barb am. Or ebi too much to understand. But the thing be sey we dey understand am already. For wona lives inside we dey do or experience things wey we no dey like, wey the we no dey like am be sekof consent. This be four examples wey dey show sey we dey understand consent already.
One time no dey mean all the time
Imagine sey today be Monday. Monday be your busiest day for school. You get lectures from 7am till 4pm. By the time 4pm knack then you taya. You just want relax for room. Maybe you go watch some movie, or you go rock FIFA small. Or some time you go call your babe then just vibe for phone top. Anything to de-stress. You buy your Indomie wey you reach your room.
You enter the room wey you see sey Sammy dey there plus boys. Sammy be your next-door neighbour. Some one time, as you dey commot, you give am spare key sekof then e dey want rock game as you no dey. You allow am once. As you enter the room you see sey boys wey you no know dey rock your game. Sammy too dey lie your bed top dey watch movie for ein lappy top. The bed wey you lay as you dey commot. The bed wey you dey dream about the whole day sekof you taya.
He watch your face wey e try halla you but you vex. You ask am sey what e dey do for your room inside. Wey e tell you sey then e feel sey you no go mind sekof you allow am that one time make e dey the room inside as you no dey.
Sekof woman allow you make you touch am once, no mean sey anytime you want touch am she for allow you.
The chow no be for you
Edoa if you dey buy waakye you dey share plus your roommate. Ebi tradition sey as you dey chop you go invite am sey make e come chop. But ebi your chow wey you dey buy, e no be sey the two of you dey contribute. Today, as you buy the waakye you make them heap the meat sekof your oldgirl say you dey lose weight so you for chop more protein. You catch room wey you kai sey you no claim your change from the seller ein there. Lef the chow for the fridge top wey you tell your roomie sey make e no touch am, you dey go come. You walk go take the change.
As you come back, you dey smell the chow for everywhere. You open the rubber wey you see sey them chop more than half the chow for inside. You bore wey you ask your roommate why e chop the chow. Wey e tell you sey then e dey hong, wey sekof you guys dey chop together normally e feel sey you no go vex. Wey edoa you no dey chop plenty so e lef you small as usual. E no dey see why you for bore.
The fact sey you then woman dey chop your body regularly no dey mean sey you fit do am as she no gree.
Unless them take dash you, e no be your own
You be somebody wey dey like dash money. If e dey you at any moment in time, everybody go feel. If you dey Bloom you dey fit buy thousand bottles. You dey sort people all the time. Some day you komot from KFC wey you dey walk to your car. Some guy see you wey e rec you from Twist. E hear your run down. You be rich guy. Get dough wey you dey like dash am. You no know what you go take your money do. The guy come stand your front wey e halla you. Sekof you no know am you just nod wey you try enter your car. Your man vex. He ask you why you ignore am? Sekof you get money you start dey rush? You no even understand why your man vex wey e push you put the car top.
The people wey dey around do like them no dey see. Your man pin you to the car but nothing you fit do sekof e big pass you. E put ein hand for your pocket commot your wallet. As e dey commot your money sef you no fit talk anything. The guy smile wey e tell you sey as for this one e no be kwashey wey e dey kwashey you. Abi you dey like dash money? Just take am like you meet somebody for street wey you give am all your cash. As e lef, that be when all the anger come. You enter your car start dey call police.
The fact sey woman get active sexual life no dey mean sey she for gree sleep plus you.
No be everyday you go fit job
Your boy tell you sey e dey want make you help am move out ein house during the weekend. You agree sekof your boy that, you no dey mind sey you go go help am. The day come wey you move go ein there. As you dey car inside, your stomach start dey feel some way. You manage reach filling station wey you find toilet shank. You get diarrhoea. The filling station get pharmacy so you buy buy some drugs. But you still make very weak. Your head start dey bash you serious sekof you make dehydrated. But you manage reach your paddy ein there.
As you catch you tell am sey you no go fit help am carry ein things sekof you no dey feel better. Your man sey e dey barb sey you no dey feel better but e dey hia your help otherwise e no go fit carry the things alone. You tell am sey e no be by force sey you for carry the things. Morrow too dey. Your man dey force you make you giddop help am. You too you no dey fit. Dey in serious pain. You bore wey you lef the place. Make e naa carry ein own thing.
The fact sey woman agree sey you then am go fit have sex no dey mean sey she no fit change ein mind.
So you see? You dey understand am already.
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About the author: Fui Can-Tamakloe is a writer and poet based in Accra, Ghana. He enjoys writing, drinking beer, and tweeting about sex. He writes in English, and Ghanaian Pidgin.